lost in the woods

meet me at the place
where we hit a dead end
in the woods I lead you into
to steal a kiss that day

I hesitated in the awkward silence
because I wasn’t there
and I thought you weren’t either
yet

a regret
now

and then I lost my way
for another year or two
but I did look for you
to say

I’m
sorry

I fell in love when I looked
at your shoes accidentally
so you did too
with sweet uncertainty

by the way
my favourite colour is blue.

have you figured out
by now
that I don’t care
what shoes you wear?

but you cared about mine
and that made me smile

I fell in love with you
the moment
you looked disappointed
I may go

I had to because
you made me want to stay

I fell in love with
your open heart hello
to a stranger
for free

there ain’t much better
than a good smile for me

you said I would fall
in love
with you
madly

silly
boy

I already had
by watching you
Be You
in between the not us

what a waste
of good time

you said that you
are shallow
one time too many
for it to be true

I don’t believe you.
you gave yourself away

I saw right through
your shades
but I forgot how you look
because I never saw your eyes

still, I looked for you
for a while

I felt you instead
and you felt good
even though you don’t believe it yet
and I told you so

you made me want to
care about you
and I didn’t have
the time

back
then

You lied.
I saw it.
you double checked
to see if I would do it too

I don’t
but I did to protect you

Omission, avoidance,
accusatory
challenges
and distraction

aren’t we
clever?

I wanted you
altogether
too much
and that scared the fuck outta me

there —
I said it.

you told me
you had money
and I’m not
even sure why

now I know more
but I still don’t get it

do you know
enough by now
to know I don’t care
about your wallet or your fuckin’ khakis?

I’m looking for the things
that money just can’t buy

you can’t fit what I want in
a safety deposit box
or secure it in a hot bit
of quick oblivion

Trust me –
I’ve tried.

and I’m not gonna
carry your baggage for you
even if it is
Louis Vitton

but I’ll take care
of mine

are you ready
to believe me?
are we there
yet?

maybe it’s never
the right time

people want an answer
finite. secure.
safe. always.
mine.

all I can
promise you
is neither of us is going
to be around forever

I should have kissed you
in the woods that day

because we’ve wasted
too much time
getting ready
all ready

no one is ever
ready for this.

so meet me
at the place where we got lost
you can try to be you and
I’ll try to be me again

maybe we can hold hands and
share a milkshake this time

we both know the rest is a given
if we still want such
things as familiar as the homes
we don’t wanna remember much.

Time enough you can see in the dark
but it doesn’t make it right

so let’s just cut
the shit
and come naked
and afraid

I like you best when you
are You
like
that

and that would be
something new

huh?

Originally released on Medium

Featured image Photo by Khoa Võ from Pexels

A PART OF

The Accidental Theory: A journey to freedom

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